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Do you suffer from suicidal or self-destructive thinking?
Feel like all the other advice out there doesn't help. Or even makes you feel worse?

This strange little channeled treatise is here to change that. It provides ten simple but oddly profound lessons that help you step out of destructive thinking and into the 'You' you truly are.

"This is the 
Book of Life
That You Wanted"  


"A strange little book that brings hope in a palpable way. So different from all the patronising advice out there." 

Screenshot 2023-06-08 at 15.36_edited.jpg
"It's like I  have some psychic abilities that I never knew I had, and it's really making my work with clients powerful. You and your amazing abilities inspired me to look deeper at myself and what I really wanted. You are such a gift to the world, thank you Efa." 

I didn’t mean to write this little book. I absolutely did mean to write a book sharing hard-earned truths around suicidal and self-destructive thinking. All the things I never saw anyone else talking about, particularly not the medical 'experts'.


You see I had long been feeling that there is an army of people out there waiting to be reached, woken up and connected. That the very people most prone to leave this earth early are the sensitive ones with great gifts, the ones who could truly matter and do incredible things, if only they could figure out how to cope and stick around. 


But I didn’t intend it to read like this, well... rather odd little treatise. But as I went to write my book this entire document flew out, my fingers going very fast, with very little need to think on my part. In less than an hour I was staring at a document of thousands of words that I had somehow typed, containing wisdom that was beyond what I was aware of knowing.

Little did I know that only a few months later my life would take a sharp curve that left me completely at sea, and challenged my sense of self in every way. That I would be facing the most challenging year of my life. This book ended up being a life line I did not know I would need. 

I knew I had to put this treatise that came through me out into the world. It chose to come through me to be shared far and wide. I sense it might be useful to you and others, just as it was useful to me.     xx Efa



This book is sold on a sliding scale. You choose what you feel called to pay.

Your purchase from the heart is deeply appreciated, it helps me market this book further and reach more people who can benefit from reading it. As well as fund future translations into other languages. 

Need to pay less, want to pay more? Donate with Paypal. 
(Please note delivery is not instant with this method
but can take up to 24 hours. Thank you.)
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Don't have a bank card and desperately need to read this book? This book is made to reach those who need it.
Email me at for a free copy. 

Pink Gradient

Magic is not a lie. It exists. And the biggest magic of all is the choice between destruction and creation. If you choose creation, you are aligning yourself with forces far greater than you, and those forces can be used to help you. This book will teach you how to listen, and widen the circle of creation. To diminish the power of the voice that says this is not possible and that there is no longer a way forward. This is the book of life you wanted.

Beauties I know you know the drill but I'm going to say it anyway. If it's an emergency, if you feel you are at risk of harming yourself or someone else, it's important to call emergency services or get yourself to the nearest hospital. If you feel you won't hurt yourself but are in an urgent way, do call a help line such as the Good Samaritans. 
(Look, I HATE this sort of advice. It always made me feel like I was being brushed off when I read this sort of thing. And I am sorry about that. But I want you to stick around. That the world needs you, whether you can see it or not in this exact moment. We are connected, and it matters to me that you stay). 
Pink Gradient

"This book is restorative, it lifts you up and aligns you even if you aren’t feeling self-destructive. And reminds you of the life force within you with its simple but profound advice. I am very glad to have found it."

Skyla J., Musician


Quotes From the Book

  • It is like there is a window you were told not to open, so you never have. And you have not long since that day forgotten there was a window at all. And now you believe that you are the small, suffocating room you find yourself in, instead of the vast world beyond the window.

  • Know this. There is so much peace on the other side of that voice. A peace that you have instinctively known was there, and tried to reach, in ways that were fleeting. Alcohol, sex, drugs, food, whatever it took to null the chatter so as to feel a strange, easy, momentary peace. And you thought it was all these substances that were the peace. Instead of just being a means to reveal the edges of the peace that always is, and always will be, there. You can’t see that just yet, as you don’t realise that You are the peace.

  • You want to kill yourself because you are a warrior! You tell yourself the inverse. That you are a loser, a failure, a nothing. That you want to kill  yourself as you are worthless. But only a warrior thinks of things in a battle. A fight of light or death. A last stand.

  • Light contains darkness. It is not the other way around. Darkness does not contain light. If you go outside in sunlight there are shadows. But in night there are not patches of natural light. You are not darkness just because you contain it within the light. You are still made of the light.

Efa’s intuitive abilities are phenomenal, credible and accurate providing great clarity and peace. I have know Efa for over 6 years and during this time she has lived her own life by her intuition and inner guidance. I strongly recommend anyone wanting answers, clarity and guidance to reach out to Efa as she is a truly beautiful soul with absolutely wonderful gifts to share.


- Matt Taylor, the Karmic Alchemist for Modern Times

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